Saturday, August 11, 2007

John Daly Update

I'm thinking about devoting this site exclusively to John Daly. He's currently -1 through 11. In related news my friend's brother just rewound the Tivo to show me Tiger's butt sweat in HD. More later. Go Daly!

Maybe Next Year

Sergio can't be too excited about how his last two majors of the year finished. First, the playoff loss to Padraig Harrington in the British, now this:

Garcia, who made the cut on the number at 5-over par, signed for a 4 on the par-4 17th hole, when he in fact recorded a 5.

He was playing alongside Boo Weekley, who was keeping his scorecard and wrote the score down incorrectly. It is the player's responsibility to check the card for accuracy and Garcia didn't do that.

Weekley had to feel kind of bad for what happened:

"It's my fault for putting the wrong score in, but it's his fault for not checking," said Weekley, who shot 5-under 65. "I just said 'Sergio, I put a 4 but in fact you had a 5.' He said, 'That just puts the icing on the cake.'"

"He just took off," Weekley said. "I called him back down and tried to get him before he got all the way up the stairs."

Ouch. But come on, Sergio! Anyone who has ever played competitive golf (be it high school or just some tournament) knows that you gotta check the card before you sign it and turn it in.

There's nothing worse than a Sergio pout, and that's what Weekley had to witness. Not only does he have to overcome Tiger Freakin Woods, but now the Sergio Pout? Good night. To be honest with you, I feel worse for Boo than Surge after this tragedy.

Bobby Cox: Roid Raging?

In this age of steroids, many milestones have been achieved; Palmeiro’s 3,000th hit and Sosa’s 600th home run, and records have been broken; Bond’s recent 756th home run, but one record has yet to be tainted. Bobby Cox is currently tied with John McGraw for the all-time lead in ejections at 131. A feat like that takes longevity, strength, and extreme anger, each happens to be an effect of the use of anabolic steroids. So it’s time for us to stop, squat, and taint this seemingly legitimate record.

The links between Cox and steroids are unavoidable; let’s start with his body transformation. Cox entered the league at a slender, 180 lb third baseman. Clearly, those ‘slender’ days are gone. There are no firm numbers available, but from my eye, honed at numerous state/county fair booths, I’d say he’s pushing 275 right now. That’s even more extreme than Bonds’ transformation.

Cox’s connection to Bonds does not end at their weight gain; Yahoo’s Jeff Passan notes another similarity:

He and Bonds share that continued greatness, and much more, too. Eight years ago, when asked by the Contra Costa Times how he hit a fastball so well, Bonds answered: "Reaction."
Earlier this week, asked to explain what caused so many of his ejections, Cox said: "It's all reaction."


Now that we’ve established, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Bobby’s been using we can establish the juice’s benefit to him. Along with longevity and brute strength, steroid use also causes an inhuman rage. The effects of roid rage have been well documented in recent weeks. Luckily for the Braves, Cox has avoided his inevitable double murder suicide, but he has had his own domestic violence issues. Universal man code notes a huge difference between slapping a ho and strangling a ho, sadly, Cox chose the later which is a clear sign of the presence of a banned substance. Throughout history, drugs have been made to increase anger and increase the likelihood of violence, verbal or otherwise. It all began with the Vikings and the mind altering drugs they’d take before battle; a modern day example would be alcohol, I almost got in a fight due to alcohol just this weekend. Alcohol, however, is legal but detectable on the breath; Cox had to turn to another drug with more subtle warning signs.

Basically, Bobby Cox has gotten a free ride for too long and it’s time that his record be put into perspective. It’s sad, but, in this era of steroids, every achievement must be scrutinized. One must ask not how many ejections Cox has received, but how many injections it took to get him there.


NY Times

Big John Grips It and Rips It

I'm not really sure where my obsession with John Daly comes from. Maybe its because his shirt is adorned with the logos of both Hooters and 84 Lumber (in line with values of this site). Maybe its because he is the first professional golfer I've seen play his second shot from the fairway of another hole. Mostly I think its because it seems like he makes every decision by thinking for a second and then saying 'fuck it'.

Daly put together a decent round yesterday (73) which puts him at E for the tournament. With most golfers you would think that would leave them in decent position to make a run heading in to the weekend, but with Big John everyone is just waiting for his blowup. Not me. I'll be watching and rooting for Daly and hoping we can see him drink beer from the Wanamaker Trophy on Sunday.

Daly should be teeing off pretty soon, so I'm off to watch that. We'll keep you updated on his progress.

World Cup (of Boxing) Preview

Tonight at 10:00 PM on HBO, Daniel Ponce De Leon and Rey Bautista meet for the WBO junior featherwight title in the main event. Ponce De Leon attempts to defend Mexico's World Cup that they obtained last year when they kicked Thailand's ass. Golden Boy Promotions is involved, which suggests that Oscar is running out of unique ways to promote his fights. A World Cup should include, well, more than two countries. Nonetheless, I'm excited about the fight as the lighter weight classes tend to produce more action fights then other higher divisions. If this fight is anything like Marquez vs. Vasquez II from last week, we are all in for a treat.

Ponce De Leon comes into the fight with three succesful title defenses and a career record of (31-1 28 KOs). His oppotnent Bautsista, only 20 years old, boasts a record of (23-0 17 KOs). Bautista wants to prove he is one of the best up and coming "pound for pound" fighters in the world. His punching power in the lower divisions is only rivaled by Manny Pacquiao.

In fact, Pacquiao's 2003 fight with Marco Antonio Barrera started this Mexico vs. [Insert name of another country] World Cup battle. This year Mexico's foe happens to be the Phillipines. The fight between Ponce De Leon and Bautista is one of 7 fights on the card.

The undercards consist of:

Davao City’s Gabi (29-3-1, 21 KO’s) versus Mexico City’s Jose Angel Beranza (30-9-2, 25 KO’s)
Banal (13-0-1, 10 KO’s) of Ermita versus Eric Ortiz (26-6-1, 17 KO’s) of Mexico City
Domingo (27-16-3 11 KO’s) of Libac versus Mexican Miguel Roman (22-0 16 KO’s)
Batawang (50-6, 34 KO’s) of Cebu versus Mexico City boxer Gerardo Verde (15-4, 11 KO’s)
Gorres (26-2-1, 14 KOs) of Mandaue City versus Mexico City’s Gerson Guerrero (33-7 25 KO’s)
Gerry Penalosa (51-6-2, 34 KO’s) of Manila versus Jhonny Gonzalez (34-5, 29 KO’s) of Mexico City

The team that wins the most number of fights wins the $500,000 World Cup and will be awarded a specially-designed trophy made by IceLink. It will be aired on ABS-CBN on August 12, 2007.

I don't think Mexicans and Filipino's hate each other yet, but hey, this is a start. The winning country gets money and a trophy. Money always causes problems between counries, and when you throw in a trophy, war is soon to follow. I hope I did an adequate job of getting everyone pumped up for the fight night. If not check out this promotional video. I don't know what they are saying, but it seems pretty freakin intense.

HBO Sports
Boxing Scene

Weekend Editor

Some random blabber from a couple days back that I've finally posted.
Poor Man's Podcast

I saw this video a few weeks back and found it absolutely hysterical. This little girl is responding to her mom's question: What will you do if a monster comes here?


Tiger was ridiculous at the PGA tour today in Southern Hills. He shot a 63, and has taken the lead. He's never lost a major with the 54 hole lead, so by tomorrow at this time, we might know he has it in the bag. I have no idea how his putt on 18 didn't stay in the hole. I've never seen anything like it. Unfortunately for the other players, it probably just pissed him off. A running diary will be kept if the weekend is at all interesting.

Baron Davis and Terri Hatcher are an item. Sooo weird for reasons that don't even need to be mentioned. [With Leather]

Friday, August 10, 2007

Friday Funny: Will Baby take Backseat to Blue Label? Problems in Lohan Land

Are the Vodka Filling Water Bottle Days Over for Lindsay?

Log has disappeared, and he was our in house celebrity gossip columnist, so we've hired outside help.

Kiss Louisville, a local pop radio station, reported that Lindsay Lohan might be pregant. Lindsay had a similiar scare a year and a half ago. This report suggests that Miss Lohan is not only a line blowing cokehead but a whore as well….Yeahyaaaaa.. I once had a dream of moving out to California and knocking up a famous celebrity such as Lushahan. I guess I made my move just a little too late. A young man from Indiana will never get to fulfill his lifelong dream. I believe I also missed my window op opportunity with Britney Spears as she seems to be regaining some sanity one open- doored poop at a time. Must have been the fried chicken she was stuffing her face with during the OK interview late last month. She probably only devoured the skins, a la Cartman.

Who knows maybe this bastard child is what Lindsay needs to get a grip on reality. I seriously doubt it though. She is gonna take one look at Fas Lohan (Fetal Alcohol Syndrome Acronym) and peace him/her to the curb. She has been to so many clubs that I bet the baby is gonna flop out dancing to house music (techno to the layman) with a glow stick in hand during delivery. Poor thing never stood a chance. Wow, another celebrity mom pushing her child to the backseat; exactly what Hollywood needs…Life just ain’t fair.

Buzzsaw, has Daly made any visits to LA lately? Your think piece is really starting to make a little more sense. If not Daly, its gotta be Phil Jackson. He's dating Jeanie Buss, and I think she just graduated from high school this past June.

Article contributed by Sockless Dilemma (friend of the blog)
I could not find the information on KissLouisville's website, and thats where they told users to go to read the rest of story. We'll figure it out.

My Career Looks so Bleak

John Daly is two off the lead at Southern Hills before the second round of the PGA Championship. At -3 under, he's looking to avoid that dreaded triple or quady that usually causes a hysterically funny meltdown. Maybe the lyrics to John's song, "My career looks so bleak", were sung to soon. If not, Daly only has himself to blame. A career fueled solely by Diet Coke, cigs, gambling, booze, and trash usually doesn't end well. However, Daly's voice is ravishing, and the sportscaster's comment after is funny.

Daly was quoted yesterday as saying:

"To be honest, I was waiting to make a 7 or 8, because that's the way it's been going the last year and a half. If there were 14 holes on a golf course, I would've won 17 tournaments in the last year and a half."
John, that's like saying "If there were 14 beers in a case, you wouldn't be an alcoholic." I think that type of logic in any sport is insane. I won't start ranting, but it really means nothing. If someone scores the first basket of a bball game is it ok to say "if basketball games were only one minute long, my team would win more." The fact is, they aren't. Stupdity.

John on Dealing with the Heat:
"I'm used to these kind of little valleys, where you don't get any air, and there's a lot of humidity, and it's tough to breathe. I light up a cigarette and drink some caffeine, and it actually works."
John on Gambling:
"I've been playing slots over at Cherokee Casino," he said. "Did good the first day; didn't do too good the other day.
I only hope Big John keeps it together until Sunday. Him and Sergio playing together in the last group with Tiger teeing off right before them, how sweet it would be. Oh, the drama that would ensue. Daly eats Sergio or strokes. I just don't know which one would happen first.

Old, Wrinkly People say “We Got Next”

Admittedly, this story is a month old. I can’t believe I missed The '07 Summer Senior Olympics as they were being held right under my nose here in Louisville. You would think the smell of gold bond, moth balls, and adult diaper change stations would have activated my dog like sense of smell. Thank you Louisville Courier Journal.

The ‘08 Summer Olympics in China will kickoff less than a year from now, but to be honest, I’m more excited about the ‘09 Senior Olympic Games which will be held in Stanford, CA. The ‘o7 Senior Games produced unspeakable drama, stories of dedication, and 16 days of ridiculous quotes that only old people can produce. 16,000 seniors invaded the city of Louisville, riding into town on RV’s, Cadillacs, motor scooters. All of the seniors, who didn’t “expire”, left with feelings of accomplishment and pride after 16 days of boring and sometimes disgusting competition. You think talking to your grandma on the phone is bad? Well, try watching 10 85+ year olds playing volleyball for an hour. What’s your gag reflex like? I’ve only seen a few pictures, but they didn’t look pretty.

Unspeakable Drama:
93 Year Old Women wins 7 Medals in 07

Going into yesterday's mixed doubles bowling, Lillian Webb of Sebring, Fla., was already loaded down with hardware -- five gold medals in track and field and another in bowling. Her feats included a record-setting 100-meter dash of 31.3 seconds for her age group. (Her age being 93.) There weren't any male bowlers in her age group, so she paired with a younger man, Harry Jackman, also a Floridian. They won the silver medal.

So, after bowling three games yesterday, she said, "Now I am really tired."

So, I’m supposed to be impressed by a record I could beat by around 22 seconds? Please.

Stories of Dedication:
Shuffleboard Comeback

Roy Armstrong and his wife, Joyce, of Water Valley, Ky., trailed 95-80 in the championship match. Joyce lined up for the final shot. She scored seven points for her side and bumped their opponents' disc from its resting place, costing them 10 points. That 17-point turnaround gave the Armstrongs an 87-85 victory.
Their home lies between Fulton and Mayfield. So, is it easy to find a place to play shuffleboard in Water Valley?

"It's impossible," Roy said. "We have to go to Martin, Tenn. -- 20 miles."

20 Miles for an old person could take upwards of 2-3 hours! Now, that’s dedication.

Is 7th Place Worth It?

How many athletes are so determined to compete that they will stay in a homeless shelter? That's what Robert Buesse of Battle Creek, Mich., did two years ago when the Games were held in Pittsburgh. He couldn't afford lodging, so he slept in a homeless shelter the week he competed in horseshoes. He said it was the only time he ever stayed in a shelter.

"The whole house was rooting for me," said Buesse, 62. "When I came back with a seventh-place ribbon, they said, 'Way to go.' "

Wow, I don’t mean to sound too critical but with that story's build up I at least expected a top three finish. You didn’t leave with a medal old man? Why were people telling him he did a good job? I’m not dishing out compliments to any senior citizen I know for a 7th place finish.

The Two most ridiculous Quotes from 16 Days of old people blabber:

Philip Godfrey, president of the National Senior Games Association, which has held these Games 20 years said.

"I know and I believe in my heart that we've taken it to a new level in 2007.”

97-year-old Leona Boehme’s response to the question “Do you feel like an athlete?”


At least one of the old timers is still with it. Louisville has placed a bid for the 2015 Senior Olympic Games. I am considering joining a committee to promote my great city. Many local Elder Law attorneys and I are interested in seeing a fresh, new batch of oldies roll into the city; however slowly that might be. I hope they start putting together some extreme Senior Olympic Games. Mobile Scooters flying off ramps. What could be better?

Thursday, August 9, 2007

College Football is almost here

Every college football fan has that one moment when they fully realize that the season has started. For some it's when the band plays the school fight song or when their team runs out of the tunnel before their first game. Mine is when the first asshole fan of the visiting team starts asking everyone: "When's the last time Notre Dame won a bowl game?". This douche is normally wearing a Michigan or Michigan State hat backwards. Either way I'm pretty excited for the best sports time of the year to start: College Football Saturdays.

Anyways, has released its listings of the most expensive college football games of the year. Even though this is most likely going to be a down year for the Irish, they are participating in four of the top five most expensive games. The only game in the top five that doesn't involve ND is, not surprisingly, OSU-Michigan:

1 Penn State vs. Notre Dame September 8 State College, Pa. $1,100
2 Michigan vs. Ohio State November 17 Ann Arbor, Mich. $1,000
3 Notre Dame vs. USC October 20 South Bend, Ind. $950
4 Michigan vs. Notre Dame September 15 Ann Arbor, Mich. $696
5 Notre Dame vs. Boston College October 13 South Bend, Ind. $661

I really can't imagine paying $1,100 for a ticket to a regular season game unless it was a rivalry game with national title implications ala OSU-Michigan last year but some people are just a little too passionate about their team I guess. These numbers are very early indicators however. I fully expect Michigan-OSU to be the most expensive ticket by the time that game comes around.

Mike Bibby wants to be a Cavalier

A friend of the blog’s, Pat, had a little run-in with Mike Bibby in the Bahamas this past week. In fact, Pat was hanging out with Bibby and his two brothers in the Dragon Club VIP room at the Royal Towers Casino for two hours. As the story goes, Bibby’s brothers recognized a friend of Pat’s, Bobby, from lifting with him earlier in the week.

Bibby’s thoughts on where he wants to be? Well, one of his brothers says he’s either going to end up with the Heat or the Cavaliers. But Bibby himself wants to be in Cleveland (Ichiro has a confused look on his face right now).

Danny Ferry, I hope you read Log's Blog. Go after this guy-- he is a real, live point guard.

Pacman thinks Pacman has only been arrested twice

Pacman’s word:

"Everybody keeps saying I've been arrested six times," Jones said. "I haven't been arrested six times. I've only been arrested twice. I've been accused and people have put warrants out on me numerous other times, but as of today I'm on no probation, I haven't been charged with anything, so I'm just keeping my head up and make sure I'm doing everything to make sure I'm all right with myself."

Cute. The best part of the article is after they explain Pacman’s take, they go on to cite his last arrest as his sixth. Then they go on to use the phrase “Besides his six arrests.” Come on, Associated Press, don’t sugarcoat and dance around the facts. Tell it like it is—Pacman is simply incorrect.

Also, what a model citizen. To be able to claim that you’ve only been arrested twice in this day and age is quite the accomplishment.

Anyway, I’ve been wasting some time by coming up with some hypothetical claims that would rival this understatement/fallacy:

  • Phil Mickelson saying “my breasts are only about a B-cup.”

  • Rick Ankiel saying “I’ve only been designated for assignment, like, once."

  • Tom Brady and Shawn Kemp agreeing that they both “have only legitimate children.”

  • Neifi Perez claiming “I am a victim of the system”—oh, wait.

  • Fred Taylor claiming “my hamstring has only bothered me this one time.”

  • Shaq admitting “Okay, so I starred in one bad movie.”

  • Brett Favre asking “remember that one time that I tossed around the idea of retiring?”

Feel free to add other mockeries to the comments. I really hate to write about Pacman again, but the guy just keeps supplying our kind with material. It’s like being a salesman for a Lamborghini; the car sells itself.

Terror Alert: John Lackey Hates the Midwestern and Eastern United States

Anaheim Angel's pitcher John Lackey started his own blog over on Yardbunker, and though he’s no Greg Oden, he’s offered some startling insight on “crappy” weather and “crappy” baseball stadiums across the Midwest and eastern part of the United States. I think the Department of Homeland Security might want to start investigating.

On April 24th, AOL Fanhouse reported that John Lackey had started his own blog. By that time, it had already been a week since Lackey delivered this chilling blog message on Yardbunker, which at the time seemed harmless:

“I'm fired up to be back on the west coast. It's been a brutal trip. The weather was crappy back east and we've been getting our butts kicked. It's just been a crappy trip. We had to go to Milwaukee last week to play Cleveland. I've never heard of anything like that. It was snowing in Milwaukee too, a lot. I'm a Texas guy. I've never seen it come down like that.”

Unfortunately, Lackey’s message of hate didn’t end with that Spring post. We were willing to give him the benefit of the doubt as winter should have been turning to spring by that point and April snow, even in Milwaukee, is atypical. However, tonight I happened to stumble across Lackey’s blog again after finishing Oden’s nausea inducing “Crib’s Video Blog", and found a post that should certainly worry any God fearin' American. Here’s what he had to say:

“I've got to say, Tampa has a great clubhouse. They have some of the best food in the league, but the stadium sucks. They have a good lunch here which is big because there really isn't much around the hotel. They have a really good post game spread too. It's kind of like a convenience store, they have a little bit of everything. Now once you leave the clubhouse inside the stadium is not so good. It would probably be worse to be playing outside though. It's 95 and 100 percent humidity. It's pretty miserable. It's like East Texas weather. I'm from West Texas where it's more of a dry heat. I guess I've been in California too long, I'm not used to the heat anymore. Honestly, this is one of the worst stadiums in the league, definitely top two or three. We leave today for Minnesota so we get two really bad ones on this trip. At least Minnesota is getting a new one though.”

He posted 20 days ago, and I just connected the dots, so I’m not blaming our intelligence agencies for missing this one.

Notice how much the level of hate has increased in the short span of 3 months. He’s isolated himself as a “Texas Guy”, and is only comfortable in California where there is no snow, cold, heat, or humidity. The Angels begin a 7 game trip out east next week which starts in Toronto and ends in Boston. I can’t even begin to imagine how much animosity he’s built up towards Toronto (Canadians in general), and their outdated Roger’s Centre field. He can’t be a fan of the Green Monster or those humid Boston nights either. I’m worried, and hope this threat isn’t taken too lightly. Can anyone say severe? He needs to explain himself immediately; due process can wait for a less critical time. Kiefer Sutherland, where are you?

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

David Beckham is Confused

Since his arrival to the States, Beckham has had a “Beckham Cam” on him during his MLS debut, his wife Victoria did a reality show about their move to Los Angeles, and he has taken some pretty weird pictures.

According to this link to, Beckham wants to play a homosexual character on the show Desperate Housewives, and singer Robbie Williams was picked to be his boyfriend:
Marc Cherry, who said Beckham picked the singer over his new American friend Tom Cruise, thinks the pair would be an ideal match: "David and Robbie are perfect to star as the new neighbours' best friends - the gorgeous, eccentric couple flown over from Blighty."

David's keen, but though the obvious choice was to work with Tom Cruise, we wanted someone who matches him in height and well, Britishness, so Robbie is the one."

They're both funny, game for a laugh and ridiculously macho, so it should work wonderfully. The English are pitch-perfect for sending themselves up."
Is this the same Robbie Williams that sang that shitty song "Millenium" and was on TRL back in the glory days? I think it’s better that I don't know. Personally, I just think Posh is pressuring him to do this because she’s looking for a little three-way action. And I don’t mean Cincinnati style chili.

Umps Really Do Suck

At the start of this week the Major League Umpires’ Union refused the league’s request to perform background checks. Clearly, the commissioners office made this request due to the NBA’s recent scandal involving Tim Donaghy’s connection to organized crime. Though the league’s intentions may not be good, and they haven’t been in many decisions lately, the overall idea of background tests is necessary for the integrity of baseball.

People don’t seem to believe that there is a great threat of ‘fixing’ games in baseball, and that’s probably true. There is no need for crooked umpires to determine a game’s outcome in order to win someone a bet. The easiest way for an umpire to win someone a bet is by changing their strike zone. If they tighten their strike zone, that means players have easier balls to hit, they will draw more walks, and, therefore, score more runs... that means the game will go over the bookie's total. In contrast, umps can increase their strike zone, thus leading to more strikeouts, less walks, and fewer runs.

Bettors have caught on to the importance of umpires on an over/under bet; they are arguably the most important part of the bet. Basically, the average percentage of called strikes is anywhere between 61.5% and 63.5%, anything outside of that zone would be bet accordingly; games with umpires over 63.5% would be bet under and visa versa. This year, for example, Lance Barksdale has one of the biggest strike zones this season at 64.68%, that lead to an average of 8.71 runs/game. On the opposite end of the spectrum, there is someone like Greg Gibson who only calls strikes 60.7% of the time. This doesn’t seem like much of a difference, but his games average 10.65 runs/game... almost a two run difference.

The problem is that Major League Baseball recognizes the imprecise nature of calling balls and strikes, they also realize each umpire’s specific trends. They hide the identity of their home plate umpires before a series begins. Bettors scramble to find out this information, the umps are released about two hours before game time. Therefore, an umpire does not even have to adjust his personal strike zone to help someone win bets. All an umpire would have to do is let the highest bidder know who is behind home plate before everyone else knows. That’s it. Baseball can’t check things like that through statistics, they’d have to do background checks to find out what type of connections these umpires have. The bettor most likely wouldn’t draw suspicion from their bookie because they wouldn’t be winning 100% of the time, rather, 65-70%. Depending on how much is being bet, the difference between winning 55% of the time and 65% can be hundreds of thousands of dollars with the umpires getting a nice piece for themselves.

Umpires have very little at stake by giving this information to people, and wouldn't be affected by their conscious because the information does not directly affect the games. However, any connections these umpires might make could turn ugly, a bookie with ties to organized crime could easily pressure a umpire for better results, hence the necessity for MLB intervention.

Umpire Stats

James "Lights Out" Toney: There's a Dart in Your Neck

James “Lights Out” Toney’s year long suspension has been reduced to six months after the California State Athletic Commission voted 6-1 in favor of the lighter punishment. If you remember, “Lights Out” and his opponent both tested positive for performance enhancers after their May 24th fight in San Jose. Toney ultimately won the fight by spilt decision, and every one assumed the match-up was fair as both fighters were both using steroids.

Well Toney’s opponent, Danny Batchelder, might have a complaint now that new information reveals Toney was on “boldenone, which {is} a fat-reducing medication for horses and can only be prescribed by veterinarians.”

So, James Toney was using the animal equivalent of Fat Predator in an attempt to lose weight for his fight against Batchelder. I don’t know what’s more shocking, Toney taking Barbaroids or the California State commission reducing his suspension after this information was revealed.

I started doing a little investigating and found out that boldenone is a little more common than you think. In fact, had this to say about boldenone.

“For something that is generally injected into cows, horses and dogs boldenone is quite a popular and well-liked drug by most bodybuilders because of its unique make-up.”

Now that’s special. I just wish Toney would have done a little more investigating before juicing up. One simple google search told me that boldenone is “easily detectable in blood tests due to its long metabloic half-life. Trace amounts of the drug can easily be detected for months after discontinued use.”

I’m not 100% sure what “long metabolic half-life” means, but I’d guess you shouldn’t take it if you think you might get tested right after a fight. “Lights Out” didn’t learn his lesson after all. Just a little over two years ago, Toney was stripped of his victory of John Ruiz for testing positive for another anabolic steroid during…wait for it…..another post-fight steroid test! Toney’s won 70 fights in his career. I can only imagine how many of those victories were juice induced.

Too bad Vick didn’t get a hold of this veterinarian who was supplying Toney with the animal steroids. He wouldn’t have had to kill so many dogs. Oh, will the Vick funny ever end? Seriously though, those dog fights would have been more entertaining.


Tuesday, August 7, 2007

A-Rod's Defense

Last night A-Rod and the Yankees faced the Blue Jays for the first time since the infamous fake “I got it” yell that caused the BJ’s third baseman to drop the ball. In the gameA-Rod was thrown at and later slid very hard and very out of his way into Jay’s SS John McDonald. Normally I would just think to myself, “Well, A-Rod is a douche and he deserved it,” but for some reason I had a very different feeling.

I realized I’m starting to feel sorry for Rodriguez. Why? Here’s a guy who is almost unquestionably the best player in the game. He’s the highest paid player in the game, which means he’s the highest paid player in any of the big three professional leagues. He plays on a team that has been in the playoffs every year he’s played for them. And yet, somehow, he seems like the most insecure athlete I have ever seen.

Most athletes are cocky and egotistical for a reason. To get to where they are, beat so many odds, and accomplish something that so many people aspire to do and fall short they must have the utmost confidence in themselves. Anything less, any self-doubt could cause them to fail. That is why we love the rare athlete who is both good and humble. It is also why I find it so remarkable that A-Rod, someone who possesses so much talent, seems so unsure of himself.

Think about the biggest stories in his career and you will realize that almost all of them were some sort of attempt to validate himself to the people around him. He signed the largest contract ever, which showed to the world just how good he really was. But then the losing got to be too much and he wanted to go somewhere where he could win. So he went to New York, eager to prove that he could contribute to a winning team and validate his career with a ring. But he wanted to prove himself to his teammates, the fans and the world so badly that he struggled immensely (hitting under .200 for the first month of the season). Playoffs? Same story. He struggled so much last year against Detroit that Torre dropped him to eighth in the batting order.

So when A-Rod hit home run 499 and promptly went 0-21 I wasn’t surprised at all. For as much talent as he has, the second he starts thinking about things he starts doubting himself and he has problems. Bottom line is that he just wants people to like him. He wants his teammates to stick up for him (something the Yankees players have never really done). He does things like yelling to make someone drop the ball, slapping the ball out the mitt of the pitcher coving first, and it all comes across all wrong.

I’m retracting all the things I’ve said about Rodriguez and ignoring the fact that he’s a Yankee and saying this: I don’t think A-Rod is a bad guy. He’s just someone who, despite his talent and success, is very insecure and misguided in his attempts for acceptance. So for once let’s just give A-Rod a break.

O'Charlie Challenges God

Charlie Weis was asked about the Irish's prospects this season, and eventually the subject of rebuilding was brought up. At first, Charlie didnt quite hear the question , and responded "Yes, I love building my own burger at Chili's. More restaurants should let you do that." Then, he realized the reporter was talking about his teams prospects, and the idea of having to rebuild. Charlie wasn't having it. Being the big, tough guy he is, Weis said, "God strike me dead if I use that word"

God, wasn't immediately available for comment, but released this press statement from Heaven:"That jackass has to be kidding. I almost killed him once in an attempt to get him off his high carb diet, and now this? So, what happens if he says rebuilding? Do I have to kill him? God damn, this puts me in a sticky situation"

Weis doesn't care. He does and says whatever he wants. I can only imagine how shocked he was when the verdict was handed down at his case. He's challenging God now, and I wouldn't be surprised if he's serious. His ego is alive and well. Unfortunately, he hasn't found a way to eat that yet.

South Bend Tribune. I forgot how funny this newspaper is.

I've Been Wondering what Josh Barfield’s Greatest Talent Was

Note: I would have posted this earlier, but I couldn’t find the booklet until I found it under my car seat a couple of days ago.

I was at an Indians-Royals game back in early June and was handed the week’s edition of “Batter Up!” that the workers hand out when you’re walking in. It contains rosters, concession stand details, the season schedule, and most importantly, a feature player and a story about him. Well, this particular week’s was Josh Barfield, second baseman ordinaire. I flipped through to the middle page, where the feature story was waiting. Usually, it’s something about the player and his kids or his contributions to a charity organization. Barfield? Not so much.

The article, titled “A True Gamer On & Off the Field” written by David Briggs of, goes on about Barfield’s “achievements” and time spent playing video games. Take special note of the complete seriousness of the author. I will do my best to summarize the article with some quotes from it:

His days often start with video games. He then heads off to work, where his portable PSP system allows him to sneak in a few more games. And finally, before he crashes, the night winds down with yet some more gaming back at his apartment with his roommate (Ryan Garko).

It’s a scholarly video-gaming lifestyle Barfield shares with many young players in the big leagues. How many other guys walked the red carpet at last year’s Video Game Awards in Las Vegas, participated in a gaming competition during Super Bowl week in Miami and are a member of the Professional Baseball Gaming League? Yes, a professional video game league. Formed by Yankees center fielder and self-proclaimed commissioner Johnny Damon.

To Barfield’s credit, he never slacked off on his rigorous gaming routine once he made it big. In fact, his passion has only heightened over time.

“I’ve never seen anyone with so much enthusiasm for video games,” Garko said. He plays in the afternoon, at night, at the park, on the plane, pretty much anywhere but second base.

If you’re an Indians fan, you’re asking yourself where that enthusiasm and “rigorous routine” is when the guy is at the plate. As of August 7, his batting average stands at .245 (OBP .273, SLG .320). He has 2 HRs and 48 RBIs through 106 games. What a joke. I almost guarantee his stats in MLB 2K7, or whichever baseball game the kids are playin’ these days, are about double that considering his gaming abilities compared his actual baseball talents.

Barfield also loves the competition…

Right now, that competition comes from his daily NBA 2K7 showdowns with Garko, a guy who just might be Barfield’s match. The roommates guess they’ve split about 100 games in the virtual basketball arena, though Barfield is coming on strong. Winning three straight, Barfield has sent his buddy into panic mode, which means Garko’s hometown Lakers will be making a cameo.

“They’re my emergency team when things aren’t going well,” Garko said. “That’s when I take it personally.”

But Barfield will be waiting. And acknowledging he’s now reached the “big time” in the video gaming world, Barfield knows he cannot be dethroned by a mere amateur.

If I’m Mark Shapiro (Cleveland's GM), I get a trade lined up involving Barfield and Garko, ASAP. This is going to turn into a carpel tunnel syndrome nightmare.

Life After 756

I’m getting pretty tired of talking about whether Barry deserves the record, or if any of these steroid-era milestones should be respected. Only one thing is certain after Bonds hits #756, your life will not be the same. You can call me a hypocrite, but I’ve come around; last year I would have been the first to say that all the “Chasing Aaron” graphics were a little premature. Now, however, I look forward to seeing if Barry hit a home run, how he’s historically fared against his next pitching matchup, etc. So exactly what changes will ESPN make to your life??

  • BottomLine- All you Giants fans will finally be able to see how your favorite player, non-Bonds division, did on ESPN’s bottom line. I feel your pain, I’ve got Tim Lincecum on my fantasy team, and when I look for his stats all I get is “CHASING AARON: Bonds: 0-3 2K’s 1BB … left game in 8th Inning.” I don’t give a shit about Mr. 756; it’s time to get back to focusing on the real season, I feel like I don't even know the Yankees or Red Sox anymore.
  • In case you didn’t catch Barry’s most recent groundout on the BottomLine, you can always log on to I’m going to miss my daily Barry updates in the breaking news section, front page headline, AND the fucking “Chasing Aaron” pop-up; sometimes they’re all about Barry at the exact same time, a steroid trifecta. Basically, my computer has something against my penis; it blocks such ads as Extenz but allows “Chasing Aaron” which is just begging me to take steroids, hit home runs, and shrink my balls… fuck you Norton.
  • Giant’s ESPN Games- I’m going to really miss watching the Giants games on TV every night. I cherish every moment I get to listen to John Miller; sounds crazy right? Not when you compare the last-place Giants' games to the atrocity that is NASCAR Now. Eric Kuselias and Brad Daugherty make John Miller look like Bob Costas.
  • Bonds Countdown- The best thing about the Giants games are the countdowns to Bonds' next at-bat. This isn’t awesome because of Bonds, I hate the douche, but I love knowing when my favorite former Brave, Ryan Klesko, is coming up. See, all I have to do is add one to the Bonds countdown to know when Klesko continues “Chasing Strawberry” for the elusive 1000 RBI milestone … Go RYNO!!!
  • Live Look Ins- This might be the only part I don’t miss about Bonds/ESPN’s “Chasing Aaron” fiasco. Have you been here? “Top of the ninth, full count, runners at first and third, two outs, ANDDDD a Barry Bonds look in. [cut to shot of Barry being intentionally walked, while you’re team is scoring the go-ahead run on the top two inches of the screen].” Yea, that’s annoying.

We can only hope that tomorrow will be the day; (channeling Bill Simmons) it’s the Nationals! It’s the Giants! It’s Major League Baseball on ESPN!!! (and ESPN2,, ESPN Mobile, and any other game you might be watching)


Digger: Highlighting a Fool

Digger Phelps is a South Bend, IN. legend. I remember going to Martin’s Supermarket with my grandma one late fall night a long, long time ago and spotting Digger. My grandma told me “that’s the basketball coach at Notre Dame”, but she didn’t have to say it. I mean, of course I knew who he was. The grocery store was about 5 minutes from Notre Dame’s campus, and Digger was decked out in ND workout gear rifling through the snack aisle like the store was going out of business. It was late and Digger was hungry. He was out of there before we even had time to blink. Sadly, that was the best chance I would have at getting the famed coach’s autograph. He became a laughing stock in his final years at ND, and was replaced by John McCloud, who shockingly, made an even bigger ass of himself. After he was booted from ND, Digger dropped of the Notre Dame map for a long time, and he became an afterthought.

Digger’s efforts in South Bend, IN and across the rest of the county since his coaching days are rather impressive. He’s worked with the United Nations, helped victims of Katrina, and worked with the local government in South Bend to improve education and pass youth initiatives. He’s a philanthropist. Good for him.

However, no amount of generosity can make up for what he’s done on the ESPN sets. I can get past his ridiculous commentary on ESPN’s new basketball version of College Game Day. Him, Dick Vitale, and Jay Bilas make my heart hurt soo bad, but all I have to do is change the channel. However, I cannot get past one thing, and it eats at me every time I see him on ESPN. I cuss, scream, and leave the room with high blood pressure. What is it you ask? His color coordinating of highlighters and ties!

The first time I saw Digger with a bright green highlighter in his hand while wearing a bright green tie, I thought it was an accident. The next time, it was the pink highlighter with the pink tie. Still, maybe it was just a coincidence. The orange and orange finally did it, and I realized he was color coordinating. Digger, why in the hell do you need a highlighter? You’re not studying for a history test. It’s probably the most obnoxious, smug, and idiotic thing of all time.

I was reading through the South Bend Tribune, as I do occasionally to remind myself just how ridiculous my old stomping grounds are, and I found an article about Digger . He’s written a book titled, ‘The Undertaker’s Son”. Pretty self-explanatory, but his Game Plan for Life really caught my eye.

Below are three of his most powerful messages:

1.Music Is Like Pizza: Pick Musical toppings to suit your taste and mellow out to beat stress.
What in the hell does that mean?

2. Always Have A Backup:
The best game plans don't prevent setbacks. Have alternatives.

Now, that almost seems like some advice he’s followed in life. Many of his game plans were ineffective at preventing setbacks, only he never had good alternatives.

Be Color Blind: Racism is wrong morally and an obstacle economically in global competition.

Digger, take some of your own advice and stop coordinating highlighters and suit ties. You might have a small chance of pulling it off if your suits weren’t 2 for 1 specials from S&K’s Menswear. Believe it or not, you aren’t a local pimp.

I can’t wait to see where this one finishes on the top seller list. Ya, I’m going to take advice from a man who color coordinates highlighters and ties. Good one.


Monday, August 6, 2007

Be Scared Brandon Inge, Be Very Scared

I checked out Curtis Granderson's blog on the other day (I don't know why, I guess it was because Buster hadn't had a blog post in two days and I was freaking out) and was pleasantly surprised to find this story. Granderson tells how while the Tigers were on their last road trip Brandon Inge broke into the blogger's room, flipped all his furniture and turned on the shower and bathroom light so he would think there was someone in his room.

While this in and of itself is not really that funny (a halfway decent prank I suppose), what Granderson has decided to do about it is rather humorous. He is asking his readers to come up with pranks to get Inge back. Some of my favorites, straight from the comments section:

  • Put Nair in his shampoo bottle.
  • "Any thing that involves poo will be hilarious. But it has to be real poo. You could put it anywhere from in his cleats, in his bball pants pocket, batting glove, inside the flap on his cap...the list goes on you decide"
  • "Create a fake ESPN baseball tonight "breaking news" reports and have it broadcast in his room while he's watching TV. Something like 'Inge traded to Tokyo's Yomiuri Giants for cash considerations'" How the f*** do you propose he go about that banstyle74 ?
  • "Get Leyland to tell him that he cleared waivers and has been traded to the Dodgers, and when he calls them, have someone there tell him they are sending him back to Double A Jacksonville for a little more seasoning." Somehow I don't see Jim Leyland as the prankster type.
And by far my favorite suggestion...

"Alright here's what you do next time you are at a hotel room. You get an average sized metal trash can and a case of a beverage you can drink a lot of. You drink all the beverages you can and spend a while peeing into the trash can.(Yeah yeah it's gross, but the payoff is worth it.) After you've filled it as much as you can, half prop it against his door, knock and run. When he opens the door, it should fall forward onto his feet, thus giving him a wonderful footbath."

Dear God.

Those Clever ESPN Folks

Did the great minds in Bristol really think we wouldn't notice? Scheduling the final results announcement of Who's Now on the final day of the PGA Event that Tiger Woods has owned ever since stepping foot on Firestone's South golf course? Woods has won six of the last ten events at Firestone Country Club, located in Akron, Ohio. On Sunday, he laughed his way up and down the course, slapping "the major caliber course" in the face by being the only player to finish in red numbers at eight-under par (-8). Hey, at least Rory gave us a storyline.

Tiger's unlucky Who's Now opponent? LeBron James from, you guessed it, Akron, Ohio. Not a bad Sunday for Tiger-- he dismantled both Akron's heralded golf course and it's pride and joy, all in one day.

Today's most Now athlete had this to say about ESPN's bracket style contest: "As a huge fan of ESPN, this is an honor. They always come up with cool new content. I'd like to thank all the fans who took the time to vote for me." I like the cool new content as well, Eldrick.

As a side note, Tiger has been playing in the event at Firestone since 1997 (they keep renaming the tournament, or I would call it by its name). Here is how he has fared in those 10 years:

T3, T5, 1, 1, 1, 4, T4, T2, 1, 1, 1

He owns Akron. The least he could do is give LeBron his due and a goddamn Who's Now title. Asshole. Yeah, I know-- another bridesmaids gown for Ohio-- it's like clockwork. (Inserting "LeBron will never be as good as Michael!" bash) But hey, we all know his Airness would have taken Tiger down! Okay, that's better.

Sunday, August 5, 2007

BARRY BONDS: An American Legend!!

(I put this picture up because he looks like a big prick in it! BARRY, BARRY,BARRY!)

So, Barry’s finally done it. The chase, which had seemingly turned into a marathon, ended when Bonds blasted #755 into the left field stands at Petco Park in San Diego. Fittingly, Chad Hensley gave up the historic home run. He tested positive for a banned substance in 2005 and was suspended by MLB for 15 games.

Bonds admired his work, as he’s done so many times, before he started making his way around the bases. The crowd’s reaction was more positive than expected, and it’s a safe to assume that 60-65% of those in attendance were applauding. I waited on this column for a long time because I had grown tired of the nonstop attention Bonds has received over the last 3 or 4 years, but now I think its fitting to fully articulate my position on Bonds and offer some coping techniques to those who absolutely can’t stand the man. Before I do all of that, I will first go on a bit of a rant about Bud Selig.

Selig created this entire mess 8-10 years ago when it was blatantly obvious that a large percentage of Major League ballplayers were using steroids. He was perfectly content using the long ball to bring baseball back. In fact, he looked like a kid in a candy shop as Sosa and McGwire went on their juice-filled pursuits of the record. Once the backlash finally came, and the fans wanted the “cheaters” called out, Selig finally stepped up and admitted there was a problem. He was the only commissioner across the 4 major sports in America who openly allowed the federal government to investigate his league. Hmmm, I wonder why? Selig only started tackling this problem when it became a black eye for MLB. Don't pretend like he gave a shit about the fans. He turned this damn thing into a circus to protect the league! Ultimately, his plan failed, but his motives are obvious. The same people who argue against ESPN for abandoning "the people who got them there" should have just as big a problem with what Selig's done to MLB. He let steriods run rampant to increase the league's entertainment value and draw fans back. Right when fans caught on, he started this huge crackdown to win back their trust and support. I don't hear to many people saying fuck MLB and predicting its demise. Doesn't make sense to me.

Anyone close to baseball had to know the severity of the steroid problem well before this crackdown begun. Even casual observer’s unquestionably knew something “smelled funny” when they watched offensive production skyrocket across the league. When Bret Boone hits 37 home runs and has 141 RBI’s, something is definitely up. Why wasn’t he doing something then? Bret Boone hitting close to 40 bombs is about twice as insane as Bonds’ 73. (I’ll prove it to you if you don’t believe me.) Oh, and look at the statistics in 98'/99' and tell me their not ridiculous.

Selig’s motives have been selfish from day one, and it’s amusing how many people think he’s done nothing wrong. He should be the man facing this intense scrutiny. Instead, he’s been patronized and given the benefit of the doubt. Leaders, in other professional business settings, face punishment when they close their eyes to unethical and illegal behavior being carried out by their employees. Moreover, it’s usually discovered that they were aware of what was going on and did absolutely nothing to stop it! Lastly, employers should face the most severe punishment in the rare instances when they actually aren't aware of what's going on. They are responsible for making sure illegal things aren't happening within the organization!

Selig basically ok’d the use of steroids in MLB in order to bolster the league's public image, and now is criticizing those who used the steroids to bolster that same image again. If the media driven steroid backlash he created didn’t exist, Selig would be inviting Jason Giambi out to dinner, not forcing him to testify as part of some joke investgation. If I’ve been confusing and you’ve missed my point, go get a dictionary and look up the word hypocrite. You’ll understand what I mean.

So, when he sits out in California looking completely disinterested and says, ““I don’t think anybody can say I haven’t made a Herculean effort” when asked about his involvement in Bonds' pursuit, I hope you can understand why I want to get on the first flight to California and punch him straight in the face.

He stood up about 5 seconds after Bonds struck the historic ball . The ball was already in the stands, and the others in attendance had long since been on their feet. Some cheered and some booed, but one thing was certain, everyone at least had some short of reaction. I guess I understand why Selig stood there expressionless. He was thinking one of two things to himself.
“I created this whole mess, and now have to act like I’m upset even though I would be cheering if everyone was oblivious to the steriods that invaded my league as I sat back and allowed it to happen.” Or, “I am pissed that he tied the record because now I’m going to have to act like I give a shit about steroids for reasons outside my bank account, my public image, and place in baseball history “ Wow, I’m getting nauseated just talking about this. He should have stood up like a man and given Barry his proper respects. After all, he's the one who basically said steriods were alright by not saying anything! His reaction would have been merited only if he had truly tried to stop the problem when it started.

One reaps what he sows. Selig’s like the idiot farmer who plants corn seed, only to act pissed, disappointed, and shocked when its harvest time. “Damn it, I planted corn seeds and got corn!" Well, no shit buddy. Corn is going to grow if you plant corn seeds. The steriod problem is going to grow if you plant the seeds of their acceptence early on! Why is this man being let off the hook with the obviously idiotic defense of "see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil."?

Back to Bonds

Unlike the announces calling the game, I knew the ball was gone once it hit the bat. I’ve marveled in too many Barry home runs to have any doubt. His pose, only rivaled by Griffey, sealed the deal, and I excitedly jumped out of my seat.

I was on cloud nine. I’ve been on “Barry Watch” for a long, long time. The whole damn thing was finally over. I was beginning to think he wasn’t going to get there with all of his injuries, his age, and his growing disgust for the personal attacks. Immediately, I sent out the same text to around 20 people, both to inform them of the historic accomplishment and create a little controversy. Below is a sampling.

Bathrick responded saying “Liking Bonds is so unAmerican. You are a homosexual”

Keg said, “Ya I’m watching juicefest.”

McCready said just one word, “awful”

Smarty (Brian Joines) Said: “I better go turn it on.” I assume he was being sarcastic.

So, the moment had arrived, and was over just as quickly. The game wasn’t stopped; no long tribute, and no Hank Aaron. He was probably somewhere far away lamenting the day Barry Lamar Bonds was born. I expected this type of reaction. The whole thing was unremarkable and that might even be an understatement. It was as if something extraordinary didn’t just happen. The most revered and sought after record in sports had been tied, and everyone sat around flummoxed (my new favorite word) This wasn’t how it was supposed to be, but it made sense nonetheless.

I couldn’t contain myself though. If you hate Barry, don’t read the next few paragraphs unless you have a barf bag freely at your disposal.

I’ve loved Barry Bonds since I can remember. I used to choke up on my bat in Little League, and had to fix the “hitch” in my swing because I mimicked his. (I guess I just never had the same bat speed.) When All-Stars came around, and we choose numbers, I always took #25. I remember watching those painful series against Atlanta in the early 90’s, and can still name off half of that Pittsburg Pirate’s roster because of him. I remember his massive first year in San Francisco, his 40/40 milestone, and how sweet he was in RBI 93 and Tony LaRussa Baseball for Sega. I loved that cross ear ring he wore. I loved the walk after he hit bombs, and I loved that really weird “snag” catch he did in the outfield for one or two years until someone told him that he looked like a cocky asshole when he did it. (I tried that in Little League too, and was unsuccessful.) Don’t ask me why, I just thought he was freakin’ sweet. I’ve met only one other true Bonds fan my entire life (Conroy aka Big Slick), so it didn’t surprise me that I was the only person in Indiana wearing an orange and black SF hat from 1994-1997.

As he approached the single season HR record, I was a senior in high school. I followed his games, and remember his record tying #70. He was in Houston, and he launched a ball deep into the stands, right in the left center gap. I remember winning a bet against Murphy because of it. I sensed Bonds was going deep, and made a 5 beer shotgun bet against him. Bonds delivered, and so did Murphy as beers were immediately being shot gunned in my kitchen sink. I remember the 2002 World Series when Barry finally lived up to his potential in the situation that mattered most. The homerun he hit against Anaheim in Game 4 or 5, was the most impressive sports moment I’ve witnessed. I have never and will never see a baseball hit that hard again. I remember reading Tim Salmon’s lips in the dugout as he said, “Oh my god. I’ve never seen a ball hit that far.” The ball didn’t land anywhere. I think its still orbiting the earth. When the Giants BLEW that series and lost, I was shocked. They were a few outs from a World Series. Barry almost had his fucking ring.

Bonds put together monster years in 2003 and 2004, but then age, injuries, and maybe a lack of steroids, caused him to slow down. The chase became a grind, and the negativity, resentment, and animosity surfaced on an even grander scale. I never worried that Bonds was going to retire before the record. He has too much pride, and is too big a prick. He wanted this record. He thinks he’s a victim. He wants to be the “martyr” who takes all of the heat for the league wide epidemic. He’s ego is so big that he thinks it only makes sense “they target me because I’m the best.” I know that’s what he is thinking.

I’ve never argued that Barry Bonds was the nicest guy. I’ve never argued that he doesn’t deserve all of the negativity. I only argue that he’s a damn good baseball player. He was the best I’d ever seen; even before he supposedly started using steroids. The only other player in his league during the 90’s was Griffey. Their numbers during that stretch are eerily similar. I just want people to understand that Bond’s never tested positive to using steroids. Moreover, he has support from a majority of Major League players both past and present. He was going to be attacked by the media regardless of whether or not he ever touched a steroid. He’s a villain, always has been and always will be. Don’t pretend that Griffey would be facing the same backlash if he was the man pursuing the record and some unproven allegations had surfaced about him. I don’t say that to attempt to prove Barry’s innocence, I just want people to admit that Bond’s would be getting attacked even if he never touched a steroid. In the end, no asterisk will be placed next to his name, and history will once again prove it has a way of forgetting how a person achieved something; it tends to focus only on results.

So, my advice to those who hate Bonds is this: Get over it and move on. A-Rod will be right on Bonds heels in around 7 years, and then we’ll have another hated guy facing unproven accusations. I think I’ve started to hear some A-Rod steroid rumors already this week. The record is Bonds’ and nothing can be done to change it. I don’t waste my time on arguments that really aren’t relevant moving forward and suggest everyone does the same. I hope people divert their attention to Selig soon. He’s the real asshole in the situation even though its far more subtle.

Barry, congratulations my man. I am happy this whole deal is almost over. Soon, I’ll only have to defend you with the simple line “what’s done is done.”

As a kid, I always loved the flashiest and most entertaining athletes, even though I am pretty close to emotionless when I compete. (Well other then the massive temper that causes me to yell at my own teammates, or criticize an idiot on the other team.) Agassi, Barry Sanders, Michael Jordan, and Barry Bonds were the athletes I started following at a young age, and they all still have a soft spot in my heart. You should have seen me during Agassi’s last US Open. I grinded out every match like I was fucking coaching him, and legitimately believed he had a shot at winning the title, even though he was moving around like a 70 yr old man. I just can’t stop rooting for the people I loved growing up. So, if I would have picked up baseball at a later age, maybe I hate Barry Bonds right now. But hey, you gotta appreciate my loyalty to the guy’s I’ve been following for over 15 years now. I can guarantee everyone that will never change!

Quick side note: My first sports recollections really start in 91’ with the Bulls win over the Lakers in the NBA finals, and then the Pirates loss to the Braves in the NL league championship. (Bonds lost three straight NL Championships. One to the Reds (4-2) and two straight to the Braves (4-3).)