Thursday, September 20, 2007

Yeah, Hines, I’m gonna have to ask you to come in on… Saturday.

This story puts a smile on my face; all the while removing that smirky ass grin from the face of Hines Ward (Sorry Logan, this article is completely necessary).

Ward owns a bar with two other business associates, the Locker Room Bar & Grille, which they opened together in December 2005. One of the associates, Nicholas Lettieri, claims that there’s money missing from the business. From (The Pittsburgh Tribune-Review):

Lettieri leveled accusations in court documents that [Kimberly] Pitts (editors note- the third associate), her husband, Korry Pitts, and Ward failed to deposit cash receipts into the company accounts and have diverted the funds to their own personal bank accounts. Lettieri states that despite profits of more than $1 million and insurance money of $500,000, the company's bank accounts totaled less than $19,000 as of last week.

As much as the Cleveland fan in me wants to make fun of Ward for stealing, I can’t look past the history of the third associate, Kimberly Pitts and her husband Korry. Korry was sentenced to 30 years in prison in 1997 for distributing narcotics (so why is he not in jail?). The point is, assumptions lead me to believe the Pitts may have had more to do with it than Ward. But that’s not nearly as fun as making funny jokes, like these ones:

  • Seriously Hines, is this necessary? First the Steelers name the field after you. And then they give you that 5 year, $27 million contract in 2005. Really? That wasn’t enough? So you had to drain out your little bar’s bank account? Greedy bastard.
  • I think Hines may have messed up a mundane detail, like Michael Bolton and the decimal point thing in Office Space. What’s next? Is Alan Faneca accidentally going to burn down the building and let Hines off free like Peter Gibbons, Samir Nagonnaworkhereanymore, and Bolton? I could see Faneca being a red Swingline guy.
  • Hey Hines, remember when the refs cheated for you in the Super Bowl? Well they can’t bail you out of this one! (cheap shot-- my apologies)

Oh, and Hines. I'm gonna need you to come in on... Sunday, too.



Buzzsaw said...

Nice find, I think Hines probably deserves a little bit of blame for going into business with a convicted felon ... but that's just me.

vinnie said...

Yawn. Perhaps you should reexamine your definition of "funny jokes".

Anonymous said...

The only reason he opened this bar was to get ass. It wasn't easy enough going into other bars, now it rolls into his. "Refs" in striped jerseys walk around and go up to girls all night when the stillers are there and ask if they "want to be VIP" and go upstairs, even if they're with other guys ("no dudes, no dudes"). The place is just a room with a bar on one wall, and about $100 worth of framed posters as decorations. You couldn't do $350k in damage (as claimed in article) if you burnt it down. I've been in nicer basement parties.

Anonymous said...

i for one thought the article was funny, vinnie.

the jerk store called, there all out of you. Zing.

Anonymous said...

I'm with Vinnie. Shame your jokes aren't half as funny as your team.


sammich said...

yea guy you suck. kill yourself please