Hot Chick Scores

Ok, I'm not a huge soccer fan, but this is one of the funniest things I've ever seen. The USA and MLS have it all wrong bringing Beckham over to increase soccer awareness in the States. They need to get a hot, naked blonde chick with an insanely powerful and accurate right foot.

I seriously couldn't believe my eyes when I watched this. She strikes a perfect shot, and the goalie looks shocked after he doesn't stop it.

Watch this a few times to get the full effect. Think about it, a hot blonde streaker takes a pass, scores a goal, then celebrates like its no big deal.

Ok, the whole thing is supposedly part of an MTV Europe commerical that tries to prevent prostitution at the World Cup, but I didn't know that until I tried to find out when it happened. I still haven't verified that, and the uniforms being worn in the MTV commerical are different than those seen in the above clip. I'll try to figure it out, but either way, it's very funny.

Sockless Says, "Becks Gives Me Nightmares"

David Beckham sits out yet another game leaving the 32,000 fans in attendance wondering to themselves why they keep buying these 15 dollar 2 bit MLS tickets. The revolution set a record in attendance for a regular season game on Sunday. Fans flocked to Gillette Stadium in hopes of seeing Beckham on the pitch. The unsatisfied had to settle with watching Cobi Jones prance up and down the field. You can insert the Gun in your mouth NOW!! Beckham has almost compiled 40 minutes on the field since his traveling circus came to the United States in late July. If I was Beckham I wouldn’t risk getting hurt in a pointless MLS regular season game either. I, like him, would fake a month long ankle sprain (ha an ankle sprain…that’s the oldest trick in the book) and rest up for the exhibition against Germany on August 22nd and the European Championship qualifying matches against Israel & Russia in mid September. So if you really want to see Beckham play I would buy tickets for a game in Late September after he gets done with his more important international matches.

I attached the first draft of my letter I am writing to David Beckham. I just hope Beck's gets his hands on it before Posh cunt can throw it away.

Dear David,

You might have the United States fooled but there is no fucking way you’re gonna pull the same shit with me. I remember watching your arrival in LAX on TV one dreadful summer night not long ago. I laughed in my head and thought to myself this guys going to promote soccer in America? This guy doesn’t even start for Real Madrid and the L.A galaxy threw a 32.5 million dollar contract at you? Your skills are quickly fading and you’re sure as shit not getting any younger. I quickly tried to change that particular news channel, but there you were again and again and again. Suddenly the joke was over and the situation got serious. I pulled my blankets over my head and tried to quickly cry myself to sleep.

I woke up the next morning sad and angry. I just want you to know I’m not pissed at you; I just question your decision making. I’m upset at the Galaxy and the media for blowing this situation entirely out of proportion. If the Galaxy were serious about “saving soccer”, they would have invested in a player who is exciting to watch like Ronaldinho, or Cristiano Ronaldo. As a matter of fact. I bet most of Europe is laughing at us dumb Americans for getting so excited about you coming here. Starting a mere 5 of 25 games for real Madrid just doesn’t cut it. If you were a real man with an ounce of dignity you, would have accepted the 2 year contract extension with your club team in Europe. With that extension you would accept the late game substitute role and add some flare towards the end of the match. If you did that I would respect you. Instead you come to America where soccer is a joke of a sport and everyone shits their pants upon your arrival. I just want to know what is going to happen when our high expectations for you don't meet up with your performances on the field? I think you might turn into a second guessing, unconfident version of A-Rod.. The media hoopla will be over and then I could get a piece of sound sleep at night! I just wanted to write this letter and let you know that I’m on to your games Mr. Beckham.

~Sockless Dilemma

p.s. Tell Posh to do something with that mop of a hair due on her bleached scalp. It makes her look like a bigger bitch than she already is.

David Beckham is Confused

Since his arrival to the States, Beckham has had a “Beckham Cam” on him during his MLS debut, his wife Victoria did a reality show about their move to Los Angeles, and he has taken some pretty weird pictures.

According to this link to digitalspy.co.uk, Beckham wants to play a homosexual character on the show Desperate Housewives, and singer Robbie Williams was picked to be his boyfriend:

Marc Cherry, who said Beckham picked the singer over his new American friend Tom Cruise, thinks the pair would be an ideal match: "David and Robbie are perfect to star as the new neighbours' best friends - the gorgeous, eccentric couple flown over from Blighty."

David's keen, but though the obvious choice was to work with Tom Cruise, we wanted someone who matches him in height and well, Britishness, so Robbie is the one."

They're both funny, game for a laugh and ridiculously macho, so it should work wonderfully. The English are pitch-perfect for sending themselves up."

Is this the same Robbie Williams that sang that shitty song "Millenium" and was on TRL back in the glory days? I think it’s better that I don't know. Personally, I just think Posh is pressuring him to do this because she’s looking for a little three-way action. And I don’t mean Cincinnati style chili.

A Real Rivalry

Last night, during the MLS All-Star game vs. Celtic, Eric Wynalda described the rivalry between Celtic and the other Scottish powerhouse Rangers as, “like Auburn-Alabama times a hundred.” Now, I don’t normally like to blindly accept any subjective assessment, especially when it comes from the mouth of Eric Wynalda, so I decided to do a little research of my own. And what did I find? Well, Wynalda’s description was far from hyperbolic. In fact, it was probably an understatement.

For starters the clubs are both located in the same city, Glasgow, Scotland. The economic inequality in the Scottish Premier League basically guarantees that Celtic and Rangers are the only two clubs who compete for the league title. They’ve played 376 times, with Rangers holding a 149-135 edge. But the real basis of the rivalry lies in religious and social issues that go back over a century.

Celtic was formed in 1888 by Irish immigrants who had come to Scotland to escape the famine. Rangers, founded fifteen years earlier have always been “the Protestant club.” Matches between the teams were always tense affairs marked by mutual hatred of fans and players alike, but the troubles in Northern Ireland between the IRA and the UVF in the 1970s only intensified the rivalry. In his book Football Against the Enemy, Simon Kuper tells how a 1975 match led to two attempted murders, two cleaver attacks, one AXE ATTACK, nine stabbings and 35 common assaults. Religion, team and political association were dangerously intertwined as shown by this fan’s account:

When I was 16, I worked for my uncle in his pub in Dublin for a summer. After a trip to Belfast we were stopped at the border by the UDR (Ulster Defense Regiment) Basically, a Protestant paramilitary lynch mob backed by the British Army. Legally, they couldn't ask if you were [Catholic] or [Protestant] so they'd ask, while pointing a rifle at you, "Who do you support, Rangers or Celtic?"

The rivalry hasn’t faded in intensity over time. Celtic fans still boo during the Scottish national anthem and wave Irish flags, while Rangers supporters sing sectionalist songs. It wasn’t until 1989 that Rangers signed a Catholic player, and he’s still the only player to every play for both teams. In 1995 a man wearing a Celtic jersey was stabbed to death as he walked past a group of Rangers supporters. A report from a hospital union in Scotland from two years ago estimated that the number of assaults in Glasgow is nine times higher after a Celtic-Rangers match. Last year Celtic keeper Artur Boruc (who played in last night’s game) nearly started a riot when he made the sign of the cross during a match. The hate even seems to extend onto the pitch. A 2001 match led to brawl that saw 10 yellow cards and three reds.

Even players who have played in the notoriously hooligan prone EPL say they’ve never experienced anything like the Celtic-Rangers rivalry. I guess it makes Auburn-Bama look like a couple of friends playing grab-ass on the playground.

A Rivalry Tied Up in Religion
Colorado to Witness Celtic Lore