The Fight to Help Boxing a Little Bit

Yesterday, Felix Trinidad and Roy Jones Jr. signed on to fight each other in what they consider to be a super-fight. Trinidad hasn't been in the ring since 2005 when he was manhandled by Winky Wright. Jones fought last month beating then undefeated, and overrated, Anthony Hanshaw. Don King will be promoting what he calls "the People's Championship."

Roy Jones Jr. at the age of 38 is getting a bit long in the tooth, but he is still one of the biggest draws in boxing today. He was one of the most dominating boxers in history throughout the 1990's, up until 2004. In 2003, he became the first fighter in 106 years to hold the heavyweight title after having held the middleweight title previously. To do that he beat John Ruiz by unanimous decision, Ruiz weighed 226lbs to Jones' 193. After this fight he and Tiger Woods became best friends. In 2004, however, Jones' legend lost some luster as he lost in a rematch to Antonio Tarver, the guy who lost to Rocky Balboa. He then lost the rubber match in that series in 2005, and has been trying to rebuild his reputation ever since.

Felix Trinidad, age 34, hasn't been in the ring since 2005 and does not plan on participating in a warm-up fight before the January bout with Roy Jones Jr, strike one. Trinidad has only won two fights in the last six years. In his fight with Wright in 2005 he lost a decision 120-107, pretty bad. His best fight was back in 1999 when he beat Oscar De la Hoya by a decision. Oh, he may also be a cheater, back in 2001 he was caught by Bernard Hopkins for illegally taping his hands. Apparently, the way he was folding the tape gave it the same effect as brass knuckles. There is a belief that this style of taping is what allowed him to be so dominant in his previous fights, strike two. He doesn't speak English, strike three.

Trinidad's out. I just don't see him being able to compete with Roy Jones Jr. even with the age difference. This fight will be fought at 170lbs which is ten pounds heavier than Trinidad has ever fought and only five pounds less than Roy Jones Jr's weight in last months fight versus Hanshaw. But we'll save the official predictions for January.

USA Today

Live Update: Tiger Tweaks Something

Tiger hit a ridiculous putt on #7 to take a four shot lead over Ernie Els today. The putt was a 25ft uphiller from the fringe. As the ball approached the cup, Tiger began moving to his left, getting ready for his standard Tiger fist pump. The putt dropped, Tiger pumped, and then, he tweaked his ankle or knee.

He tried to play it off like he was Joe Cool, but the limp was noticeable. I think the spikes got caught in the deep stuff around the green. Can you imagine if a fist pumped caused a torn ligament, and he couldn't pursue Jack's record for a year or two?

Quickly, Ernie just birdied to move to -5 under, Tiger bogeyed to move to -8 under, so the Big Easy is now only three off the lead. Ernie tore his ACL riding an intertube a few years back, so he must have some sympathy for Tiger. Tiger better be careful, between this and his "Swamp Ass", he might be in trouble.

Tiger Woods: Swamped

(Photo by Streeter Lecka/Getty Images)
Getty Images

Tiger Woods is winning the PGA battle, but losing a more important war; the one he's currently fighting with "Swamp Ass". I don't know if it was the pants, but he looked worse than Big John Daly. Now, Daly keeps cool by slamming warm Diet Cokes and smoking "heaters", so Tiger is doing something wrong. I was embarrassed for him. Look at that picture; he is smiling to hide the embarrassment that is "Swamp Ass". His version of the dreaded affliction has actually crept to the front side of the pants, and now it’s safe to say “Swamp Ass’s” more evil cousin, "Swamp Cock" is playing for keeps.

At the beginning of the PGA Championship, Tiger was asked about the intense heat and humidity at the PGA Championship in Oklahoma, and said:

"I just change gloves more often. That's about it. As far as your concentration waning, I don't see how that can ever be a problem."

Well Tiger, you might want to consider changing pants at the turn on Sunday. The temperatures at Southern Hills have been in the100's all week, with heat indexes over 110 degrees at some points. Sunday is expected to be even warmer. I know he's never lost a major with the 54 hole lead, going 12-12, so he doesn't have to worry about that.......but going 0-1 against the "Swamp Family" might not be worth that 13 slam.

Thank God I'm too poor to afford HD.

TwinCities.com: Tiger IS Sweating the heat. Literally

John Daly Update

I'm thinking about devoting this site exclusively to John Daly. He's currently -1 through 11. In related news my friend's brother just rewound the Tivo to show me Tiger's butt sweat in HD. More later. Go Daly!

Weekend Editor

Some random blabber from a couple days back that I've finally posted.
Poor Man's Podcast

I saw this video a few weeks back and found it absolutely hysterical. This little girl is responding to her mom's question: What will you do if a monster comes here?



Sports:

Tiger was ridiculous at the PGA tour today in Southern Hills. He shot a 63, and has taken the lead. He's never lost a major with the 54 hole lead, so by tomorrow at this time, we might know he has it in the bag. I have no idea how his putt on 18 didn't stay in the hole. I've never seen anything like it. Unfortunately for the other players, it probably just pissed him off. A running diary will be kept if the weekend is at all interesting.

Baron Davis and Terri Hatcher are an item. Sooo weird for reasons that don't even need to be mentioned. [With Leather]

Those Clever ESPN Folks

Did the great minds in Bristol really think we wouldn't notice? Scheduling the final results announcement of Who's Now on the final day of the PGA Event that Tiger Woods has owned ever since stepping foot on Firestone's South golf course? Woods has won six of the last ten events at Firestone Country Club, located in Akron, Ohio. On Sunday, he laughed his way up and down the course, slapping "the major caliber course" in the face by being the only player to finish in red numbers at eight-under par (-8). Hey, at least Rory gave us a storyline.

Tiger's unlucky Who's Now opponent? LeBron James from, you guessed it, Akron, Ohio. Not a bad Sunday for Tiger-- he dismantled both Akron's heralded golf course and it's pride and joy, all in one day.

Today's most Now athlete had this to say about ESPN's bracket style contest: "As a huge fan of ESPN, this is an honor. They always come up with cool new content. I'd like to thank all the fans who took the time to vote for me." I like the cool new content as well, Eldrick.

As a side note, Tiger has been playing in the event at Firestone since 1997 (they keep renaming the tournament, or I would call it by its name). Here is how he has fared in those 10 years:

T3, T5, 1, 1, 1, 4, T4, T2, 1, 1, 1

He owns Akron. The least he could do is give LeBron his due and a goddamn Who's Now title. Asshole. Yeah, I know-- another bridesmaids gown for Ohio-- it's like clockwork. (Inserting "LeBron will never be as good as Michael!" bash) But hey, we all know his Airness would have taken Tiger down! Okay, that's better.

The Ohio Bridesmaids: We Care about "Who's Now"

Not again, and not ESPN. I’m beginning to think this is some kind of sick joke.We’ve already documented the 2^nd place finishes of the Ohio State Buckeye football and basketball teams, as well as the crushing defeat of the the Cavaliers at the hands of the French flag waving Tony Parker and his Spurs. Next, came the loss of the Columbus Destroyers in the Arena whatever you call it. However, we thought the insanity was over until the Cleveland Indians made an improbable run to the World Series only to suffer a loss to whichever NL team plays poorly enough to sneak in. (I won’t even begin to touch on the rumors of Michael Vick’s planned midseason raid of the Dawg Pound.)

Now, we find out that Lebron James is facing Tiger Woods in ESPN’s “Who’s Now” championship. You’ve got to be kidding me. Lebron navigated through his tough bracket defeating Kelly Slater, who’s nickname in the bracket was the fitting “Who’s That”. I think she may have been in Playboy, so I guess I shouldn’t be complaining. In the semifinals, Lebron took down Shaquille O’Neil, setting up a match-up with ESPN’s “King of Swing” Tiger Woods. We all know how this one is going to end.

I’m pretty sure Tiger doesn’t lose unless he wants to. One would be foolish to assume he’s not going to do everything in his power to ensure victory, even if that means skipping his preparation for the PGA Championship to vote for himself 1 million times over the next day. Hey, the guy is an absolute nut. So, the trend will most certainly continue regardless of any attempt by Stuart Scott to sway the vote with his “Boo-Yahs” and “Cooler than the other side of the pillow’ references during Lebron’s highlight package.

We were beginning to think that Ohio, the bridesmaid, would eventually get her chance. I guess that’s not the case. Ohio is like the really fat, ugly bridesmaid who lost her shot at getting married a few too many twinkies ago. The state of Florida crushed any Ohio State Buckeye title hopes, and now it looks like one of its residents will do the same. It’s unfortunate, a “Who’s Now” victory would have completely made up for the other crushing Ohio defeats. Wait, not at all, but it would have been a start. A really, really small and annoying start.

Damn, Lebron even played second fiddle to Kimmel at the ESPY’s.

(This was a Guy Production in association with Poor Man's Entertainment. All information contained above came from Guy who was attending a concert and had no internet access.)