Monday, August 13, 2007

Was our Editor in Federer’s Head?

How can you blame Roger for being scared?

So, it was all lined up for Roger Federer. He’s the best tennis player of all time. He’s close to breaking every tennis record in history. He had won 16 straight Master’s Series' Rogers Cup matches; including three for three in his last three tries. Almost everything pointed towards another Federer route on Sunday in Montreal. A 50th tournament victory seemed all but guaranteed as he matched up with Novak Djokovic So, when Federer lost (6-7,6-2,6-7) on Sunday, I needed an explanation.

I can think of only one plausible reason. Something shocking, something unnerving, something majestic was happening yesterday as Roger tried to win another tournament. As his match drew near, a young Logan Conner was boarding a plane that would soon be landing in Europe. His destination: Switzerland. Move over Roger, there was soon to be a new sheriff in town. Well, that’s assuming there are sheriffs in Switzerland, if not, replace sheriff with soldier.

Did Federer catch wind of this news? Was Log in Federer’s head? I wouldn’t blame Federer for being intimated. Log plans on “raping and pillaging that damn country until it bleeds Irish Green.”, which are his words. Ya, it shocked me to, but he seemed serious.

Immediately after that comment Log screamed “I HATE SWISS ARMY KNIVES” as he pounded on his chest.

Federer now knows that Switzerland is no longer safe. An angry, almost famous blog editor plans on stealing a lot of the spotlight, and Federer’s girlfriend if he gets a chance. I just hope the country is big enough for the two of them. I literally couldn’t understand how Federer lost. Either Logan, our esteemed editor, was in Fed’s head, or his opponent, Novak Djokovic, was on steroids. Hmmm, I think Sockless might have his own theory on Federer’s loss.

A month ago I asked Logan, "What are you going to do when you get to Switzerland?"

He responded not with words, but with the picture you see at the top of the page. It makes so much sense now.

To be continued……like any of the great TGIF Full House Episodes that you just couldn’t wait for back in the day.

1 Comment:

Buzzsaw said...

I was wondering why the hell Federer lost, every thing is clear to me now. Can you imagine how many people just lost their $100,000 to make $1,000 bets. I feel bad for them.